Today was an absolutely awful day!!! And by absolutely awful I mean the worst day in the history of the world. Okay, so...a slight exageration, but it really was quite bad. I had a lot to think about tonight on my run/walk.
I'm thinking that this may be my last season of coaching water polo. I absolutely love it...but it takes away from so many other things. I have to remind myself too many times that my priority can not be water polo. I do not have a lot of time to spend with my daughter, and I'm a mom before anything else. And now, especially since tournaments are starting, I will miss out on six of the next seven Saturdays with her. And, I know it bothers her because she tells me it does. And it kills me...really kills me. It wasn't as hard when I had someone there to help me out. And I know I have my parents, but I can't keep asking them to give up thier time to help me out. It just isn't fair to her or to me.
And, my job has to come first over my hobby. My students suffer during water polo season because I am so preoccupied with the sport and all the stuff that goes along with it.
I know I need to put some more thought into it. I thought about it pretty much the entire time I was running tonight...in between convincing myself not to walk the whole thing. It would be tough for me to give up, really really tough. I acutally got all weepy during one of the walks because I was so upset about acutally considering the possibility of quitting. I need to think long and hard about this.
Now, about the run. Tonight was the best one I've taken in two weeks. I wanted to walk, but mostly because I have a lot on my mind. I got through every run and kept pushing myself. I know I will be a bit sore tomorrow, but I've got 2 days off. I'll start week 2 on Sunday night. I'm feeling pretty confident right now. I want to finish this 5K but I need to be realistic and set short terms goals and work my way up.
Off to bed... I need some good sound sleep tonight.
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